When you think of a couple arguing, what’s the first image that comes to mind? Al and Peggy Bundy from “Married with Children”? Ike and Tina Turner? How about the characters of the new YouTube series “Love is Blind”? It’s important to remember that what may seem or sound like a fight between a couple may actually be something constructive going on that’s healthy for the relationship. There are a few scenes from Episode 5 that back up this point well.
For example, as Rodney and Fatimah walk under an umbrella and talk about the arranged marriage her parents are planning for her, to someone passing by it may seem as though they are in a heated argument, especially when Fatimah smacks him in the chest after he expresses how he disagrees with her family’s traditional ways. He has right to be upset, and without being able to express that fact there is no way that the two of them could be able to see each other’s point of view. He tells her how she should speak up to her folks, and lets her know that being timid and quiet is not helping the situation. By the end of the talk they are laughing and joking again, and the argument actually brought the two teenagers closer.
Couples are going to disagree about some things, that’s a given. What turns a disagreement into an all-out argument (most of the time) is when someone starts yelling at the other. No one likes to be screamed at, no matter if they’re deep in love or not. Fatimah’s parents had a heated argument on their couch about the fact that her mom stays at home while her dad goes out for lots of hours a day working. She begins to scream at him in defense of her everyday activities in Episode 5 of Love is Blind yelling that just because she is at home doesn’t mean that she doesn’t cook, clean, and work just as hard herself.
People should respect their boyfriend or girlfriend (or husband or wife) as a person, and don’t be so loud during a discussion that the neighbors are in their business. If the two of them are talking one on one privately about an issue, then it should stay that way. It’s when nosy outsiders get into it that a couple will grow apart. At the end of the argument on the couch between the older pair, they seemed to have come to a point where they couldn’t even look at each other. That likely wouldn’t have happened if they just would have watched their tone and talked to each other like a married union should.
Remember, relationships are give and take. The younger characters in YouTube’s new series Love is Blind (Fatimah and Robert) seem to get that. But the older couple, Fatimah’s parents, seems like they could actually learn how to love each other better from the teenagers. The young couple, for example, is accepting of small idiosyncrasies and miniscule things about each other (Fatimah playfully teases Rodney about his hair being nappy in the umbrella scene, for example). If you love a person completely and unconditionally, you’ll actually begin to see the beauty in their flaws.