A problem as defined by Google means, “A matter or situation regarded as unwelcome or harmful and needing to be dealt with and overcome.” Like it or not, our lives are full of them and even when we have enough of our own, often we take on the problems of others. Why, because many of us want to do everything possible to help those who are near and dear to our hearts.
When I look around me I see many problem solving perspectives: some ignore problems all together living in denial of the situation, others notably see issues in their space but they choose not to address them until these problems sever into something more severe and then there are individuals like myself who try to see problems for what they are and work to proactively address these concerns head on to avoid continued and/or future suffering.
Where do you fall in the above categories?
We really must first sort our own problems from those of others. We are not here to problem-solve for those who surround us. When we do, we might offer a solution that suits us just fine but it is likely to be only a short-term fix to the individual you are trying to help. I’m not telling you to turn your back to others in distress but instead be supportive, empathetic (be there as a shoulder to lean on) and perhaps, gently nudge your loved one into a needed brainstorming mode so this individual can determine what feels right for him or her. Our answer might work for us but since we do not walk the path of someone else, it may not necessarily be the best solution for another individual.
Do you ignore your problems completely because you do not want to deal with the issue perhaps allowing others to step in instead of taking the reigns yourself? If this is the case, I challenge you to step up and develop your problem-solving skills; it’s your path unique to you. Others may sympathize and offer advice but you must make the ultimate decision and be accountable for the outcome in order to grow from the experience.
J. Donald Walters once said, “You will find peace not by trying to escape your problems, but by confronting them courageously. You will find peace not in denial, but in victory.”
I found another quote by Leroy Hood on BrainyQuote.com I felt appropriate to close with, “Don’t underestimate the power of your vision to change the world. Whether that world is your office, your community, an industry or a global movement, you need to have a core belief that what you contribute can fundamentally change the paradigm or way of thinking about problems.”
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