While the upside of online dating remains obvious—being convenient and provides immediacy for the users—there is a dark underbelly of drawbacks for it, too. In the platform where quantity and convenience is afloat, does it equate to quality of prospects as well? Well, according to science, it’s not always the case.
With more than 38 percent of American singles frolicking the online surface looking for love, a whole body of scientific approach provides a whole new perspective on it. There are hundreds, if not, thousands of online dating sites abundant today. Though they have come a long way since 1995’s Match.com, there are several major studies showing that there are several reasons why you should avoid the online dating scene and get in touch with real-life dating instead.
In this article, we’ve managed to gather the most obvious (and outright justifiable) drawbacks that online dating brings to the table. This way, you’ll be more convinced into meeting people IRL (in real life).
1, Unlimited Options Means Only A Few Ones Are Committed
It’s a paradox called the “paradox of choice”. If you are presented with an unlimited pool of choices, not only will you feel that you’re less satisfied with your decision, but oftentimes you’ll also end up freezing and decide not to make a choice at all. With countless numbers of options at your fingertips, online daters were found to be less than willing to commit. Due to the notion that they can have anyone new with just the click of a button, almost everyone feels that they can ultimately land something better.
2, You’ll See People as Commodities
In 2012, there was a comprehensive review of online dating sites that found their users were “commoditizing” other users or their potential dates. During users’ time searching for potential dates, they are presented with an infinite number of choices. And in that situation, these users can become overly picky. Women were even deemed undesirable with any other profile picture they pick.
3, Communicating Online Before Meeting Poses Unrealistic Expectations
Chatting pre-dates or even in the getting-to-know stage is a great way to vet your potential dates. However there is a “tipping point” at which the information your telling your prospect may hurt both of your love life. According to a recent study, chatting online longer than 17 days prior to meeting face-to-face leads to major disappointment at both ends. During those time they are communicating, there are certain information gaps that needs to be filled. And lo and behold, they usually fill it out with qualities they do not have but rather with qualities they would like to possess. Also, according to the study, meeting said person between 17-23 days, which is considered as the “peak of idealization”, is the worst time for their initial contact.
4, Compatibility Algorithms Aren’t As Effective As They Sound
Since the questionnaires only gathers information about singles way before they are matched, they have no way of gauging how these said people will act once they’ve matched. Of course, their initial interests can be gathered, it does not equate to a full-blown data that measures one’s capability with another. Factors like sexual compatibility, problem-solving skills, communication patterns, etc. are all crucial in determining whether a future relationship can be successful or not. And currently, online dating sites have no way of measuring it.
5, Trolls…They’re Everywhere!
In all corners of the Internet, there are trolls lurking about. Online dating sites aren’t any exceptions. Whether they are out to harass, intimidate, scam, or even make you desperate, these trolls are inevitable when it comes to online dating sites. According to one study, a whopping 42 percent of women have been harassed by trolls in online dating sites.
6, Profiles Provide Ineffable Information About Your Potential Dates
Sure, if you want to find someone with your similar interests, then online dating is a great way to narrow down your search for your ultimate love. But if you’re looking for dates with a specific personality in mind, then you’ll have to meet that one in person. While online dating sites can be a great way to narrow down your search based on calculative attributes such as religion or income, it’s seemingly impossible that you can categorize them by “experiential” attributes like rapport. And if there is any way that they can measure it, as one poll conducted carried out by WOW Date, almost 54 percent feels that someone they’ve met have misrepresented themselves according to their profile.
7, Online Dating Does Not Guarantee A Date
Call it standing you up, making you look desperate, or whatever you would like to call it: you can’t always get a date from online dating sites! Almost one-third of online daters have admitted that they hadn’t gone out on an actual face-to-face date with their matches—even with a planned date already set-up!
But at the end of the day, this doesn’t mean that online dating is worse than traditional dating or that it shouldn’t be considered as a way of meeting people. It does come in handy that these findings can help you navigate your way as you find your one true love among the millions in online dating sites.